Questions for Tomorrow

I’m still out of power, but I’m staying with a kind friend for a couple of days. I’m supposed to get power back at my house tonight, but my work is supposed to be out until next Wednesday/ Thursday. It concerns me because we are the food bank for that area, and the people we serve don’t tend to have energy stores or food saved up. We are emergency relief, but if we don’t have electricity for our lights, our phones, and our refrigerator, how are we supposed to serve our community? I’m thankful that a family took me in while I wait out the weather, but what about all of the families that we serve who live in travel trailers that don’t have options like that? How have they survived snowmaggedon 2012?

On another note, when I haven’t been thinking about work, I have spent lots of time reading. I spent 4-5 hours at the library yesterday, reading and finding new books. One of my favorite books that I found was Intern Nation: How to Earn Nothing and Learn Little in the Brave New Economy.I found it a fascinating read about this professional rite-of-passage.  The author, Ross Perlin, discusses the implications of internships for the entrance of young people into professional careers. He talks about how people give free labor to these companies, and often times have to invest their own money into what are supposed to be career starts in many different industries. Only young adults from upper middle class families can afford to pay for their children to go through these internships. Because of this, this is one of those other areas of life where it shows that the inequality gap is growing.

I get frustrated because I’m still trying to figure out what happens next with my life. Part of me wants to go travel the world, finding short term work in other countries, learning Spanish better, and not committing to much of anything or anywhere. Another part of me wants the stability of a career and the commitment of a serious relationship (or any relationship, for that matter). Sitting around for a week without power gives me lots of time to think about these things, and to contemplate the state of society and all that. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do next, where I’m going, or what I’m doing. I know things will fall into place when they need to and that the time will come when I’ll be able to look back and say that this time in life brought me to where I needed to be. I go through this cycle of questions every year: grad school? travel? job? men?

I have no answers, and it doesn’t seem like answers will be falling from the sky anytime soon.