Take that First Step into the Unknown
Am I ready? No, not now, not yet.
Now I know where I’m going, and I’m taking a step forward from where I am to get to the place I’m going, but I don’t know anything more than that. I don’t know where I’ll be living, or with whom. I don’t know anyone that I’ll be working with, I haven’t been to the place that will be my residence, and I probably won’t get to take my sweet little kitty with me.
I wondered how I would feel when I found out these things. I speculated in a post last week about the emotions that would hit me when I knew what was happening. Funny thing…I think all of the emotions that have pulsed through my veins the last two days have been the same as all of those while I was waiting. I was initially so excited, I thought that it couldn’t be true. They didn’t really offer me a position 20 minutes after I interviewed. They’re going to call back and tell me that they made a mistake. When I realized that it was true and that I actually will be moving to one of the cloudiest and rainiest cities in the entire country, and I had 10 days to find a place to live, the anxiety hit me, hard.
It’s so easy for me to think about everything that could potentially go wrong, and to focus on the small things that won’t be absolutely perfect, but I suppose I’ve got to remember that the space in between what I have known and what I have no idea about is still way smaller than God. Yes, I know, we’re thinking abstractly here. I have prayed for him to open a door, to show me a path. I believe we can only take one step at a time because of all of the changes in life and the fact that we’ve got to have some room for him to remind us of himself. I’ve had lots of that room for a long time, and even though I now see my next step, there are still plenty more right in front of that one that are obscured.
Time to take another step and commit to a rooming situation. Then to pack up my life in a car with a few scratches and lots of miles, and to drive off into the clouds, to see the beauty of the mountains and the water that our cloudless skies could never support.
Time for me to walk on the water.
from Walk on the Water by Britt Nicole
“So what are you waiting for?
What do you have to lose?
Your insecurities try to alter you
You know you’re made for more
So don’t be afraid to move
Your faith is all
It takes and you can
Walk on the water too”